How to Cast Off Your Victim Mentality (Blogging Challenge Day 9)

Hmmm… just reading the title of this post will cause immediate triggers of…. that’s me, that’s not me, self judgement and feelings of being superior…. I’m mind-reading a little here. All of us on some level will react to victim energy.

In my work I see this energy at play time and time again. Carl Jung said that we all carry 4 main archetypes (read parts of our personality) the wounded child, the saboteur, the prostitute and the victim. It is the victim that I’m talking about today.

Whether you feel you are not one, EVER!

or if you feel that you have found yourself in this place because of different situations, upbringings, illnesses…

or if you find yourself saying to yourself ‘so and so makes me feel….”

or if you look for validation and direction from a spiritual coach/healer or mentor all the time

or even if you beat yourself up inside for all the things you aren’t achieving, victimising yourself

or if you feel that others around are stuck and despite seeing the way forward chose not to take it, judging that they are ‘low vibe’

you will be working in, around and through victim energy.

Sometimes I see the victim wrapped around a client tightly and heavily and I can describe that as someone wearing a cloak of what has happened to them and living a life that is defined by their past. I see it often in those who have experienced physical pain or traumatic circumstances, it is so hard for them to move through this energy, to look it in the face, see it has gone and move forward without it.

Sometimes I see the victim hiding within the heart chakra and I can describe that as a need to be loved but not feeling worthy of it alone so using past trauma to draw attention and sympathy. This is often connected to a wounded child.

Sometimes I see the victim running along behind a client’s energy and I can describe that as complete denial of any victim within and a distrust of working through any ‘drama’ or feeling empathy or compassion for oneself. This leads to lack of empathy for others and a feeling of being ‘more than’ which in effect lowers the vibration.


In myself, I have come through many experiences and I’ll share with you here one in particular. My father passed over 3 years ago, it was a shock. My relationship with him in this life was strained, he liked to control, was extremely negative, an alcoholic and from a generation where racism and bigotry were part of life and accepted. He was also an atheist, something he was proud of. I felt better than him. I felt held back by him. I felt unloved and unworthy because of him. I felt criticized and ridiculed by him. All of these things were me being the victim of his energy. For a long time in my life, I lived by his rules, looked to him for approval and lived my life based on his values and principles. Needless to say, this was not a happy nor healthy way to go about this precious existence.

I was lucky though, I have a super power, I have a gift that struggled and pushed to be seen and heard and used. I am a master of energy, healing, self discovery and life development. First of course I had to master my own energy, heal my body, mind and spirit, discover who I was and develop my life to this place I find myself in now.

I found the most important healing I gave myself was to step away from ‘victim’. To take total responsibility for all the things that have happened to me, to accept, understand and love the challenges I have had in my life, rather than lamenting them. This shifted my energy in ways I cannot explain. The quantifiable things were an increase in energy, a heightened awareness of the World and spirit. And, most importantly a redefined relationship with the man that gave me this life.. my Dad. Before he died I am so happy to tell you that we healed our relationship and I was able to say goodbye to him in unconditional love.

Now I am privileged to work with amazing woman who are searching to find more clarity in their life, who want to expand their own gifts and super powers so that their businesses will grow, they will attract more clients, make more money and be healthier and happier in who they are. My journey took years (I’ve been working with energy for 20) of working with spirit, with psychology, with my physical body and during that time I have developed my unique style of mentoring, that uses shamanic energetic work, psychology of the soul, mindset work and practical actions that bring the work into reality.

My mission is to help as many people as I can to be the best version of themselves that they can be so they can go out into the World and make a massive impact.

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